Let’s Connect!

Camellias & Copper

A Southern Girl's Blog About Life

On Being Overwhelmed and Anxious…

by Filed Under: Being a Mom, Faith, Life Leave a Comment

Yesterday I wrote a post summarizing part of a seminar/conference I got to participate in on Monday. In that post I spoke a little about being overwhelmed and/or anxious. Whether it’s related to the events of 2020 or not, we can all experience these emotions, physical paralysis and and other effects from either or both of these conditions.

Side note, I am no doctor, counselor or anything else with an advanced degree or expertise in these areas. I’m just a girl who deals with being overwhelmed and anxious from time to time, and these are my thoughts that follow.

I really wanted to ask first of all, what do you do when you are feeling overwhelmed or anxious? My big two are prayer and reading my Bible. Sometimes a walk or exercise helps me clear my mind. Other times it’s talking things out with either Andrew or my best friend Ann. I find when I hold it all in…like a ticking time bomb, eventually I’ll explode. And that’s certainly not ideal for me or those around me.

Let’s start with being overwhelmed. I for one can become paralyzed and distant when I am overwhelmed. You?
Churning in my innermost person of all the things that need to be done, but yet, I can’t figure out where or how to start. Sometimes it helps to talk it out with Andrew, so he can help me untangle that which keeps me stuck and then I start writing lists. The lists help me sort out visually the tangles in my mind and then I am able to realize that everything that needs to be done doesn’t HAVE to be done now or today or this week.
When I finally am able to muster the energy and determination to start, I’m in a good place…but it can take me some time to get to that starting line.

A simple phrase, that we all learned from Nike way back when, is “Just Do It.” And I tell myself this a lot when I continually procrastinate on something that I know would just be DONE if I would do it already. Hello, laundry.

When I am feeling anxious I remember that I am a child of the living God. There’s a card framed on my desk at home that I received from a former co-worker a couple of years ago that reads:
I am a daughter of the conquering King.
Greater is He who lives in me than he who lives in the world.
I know this. I believe this. I commit to live this. And because of this, I will live a life of victory that brings honor and glory and praise to my King.
Amen.

MY King. He is mine and I am His.

When I am anxious, most of the time it has to do with my lack of control. Anyone else out there a control freak? Geez. Isn’t it so annoying?! I hate being this way – it is the thorn in my side.
So yes, I can recognize, after some 20+ years of trying to figure it out, that most of my anxiety stems from not being able to control that which is around me. Mostly situations.

The question I often have to ask myself in these moment is, “Do I trust myself more than God?”

What a question, right? The answer is no. But maybe it’s a “no?” instead of “NO!” Anyone else struggle with that?

>Sigh.<

Could we remember together that God is good. God is sovereign – Romans 8:28. He is on the throne when there’s chaos swirling around me. He lives in me by His Spirit and goodness knows I am so thankful for that truth.

He gives strength for today. His mercies are new for each day. Sister, if you are struggling with being overwhelmed and/or anxiety, I encourage you again today to talk to someone. You are most certainly never alone, especially if you claim Christ.

Thank you for allowing me to share my heart with you again today. Until next time…

Tuesday Thoughts : 12/8/20

by Filed Under: Faith, Life, Planning Leave a Comment

Yesterday I had the great privilege to watch Cultivate Your Year Live! If you are not familiar with Cultivate What Matters – think goal planner for the super “type A”. haha. Raise your hand if you’re in that camp with me πŸ™‚
But seriously, I have really come to love the PowerSheets Planner and when I purchased my new 2021 planner back in October I also go the ticket to watch the live programming to be encouraged and challenged to make 2021 my best year yet!

I got to spend SIX hours with my sweet neighbor Laura, in her dining room, thinking and planning, stickering and getting creative. It was time WELL spent – figuring out how to make the MOST of 2021.

One of the interesting questions that was asked in the beginning yesterday was, “How are you?” and not just a passive question, where you just say “fine.” “great.” “kids are driving me bonkers but we’re surviving!” response, but a dig in and really think about HOW.ARE.YOU.

Almost every woman that was utilizing the chat box, and remember there were over 1,000 of us watching…almost every person who typed a response said either “overwhelmed” or “anxious”.

I tell you that for two reasons. 1. If you are feeling overwhelmed and/or anxious – because sometimes the two go hand-in-hand, you are not alone. Read it again. You are not alone.
You aren’t. Pick a friend and text or call her. Ask her if she’s feeling either of those and I bet you she’ll say yes. We are all in the same camp. Maybe especially with 2020, or maybe because of this season of life. But most assuredly, you are not alone.
Reason 2. Don’t let your feelings run your life. Maybe, don’t let your feelings ruin your life. “Easier said than done, sometimes”…amIright? I’ll be the first to raise her hand and tell you that I most often react based on my feelings/emotions. If you’re in that camp with me…let’s take hold of the thoughts, the feelings, the emotions of being overwhelmed and anxious and not let them get the best of us, or take the best of us away.

An exercise I’ve been working on lately is remembering to ‘take every thought captive to the obedience of Christ.’ I sift the overwhelmed thoughts of “I can’t do this.” “I’m too busy/overwhelmed/stressed/anxious to think about/do that thing right now.” “I don’t even know where to start.” “I’m not capable of or smart enough to figure that out.” And I remember that HE has equipped me for that thing right now. I don’t need to be looking ahead to Friday when it’s only Tuesday. His mercies are new for me TODAY. Today. I can DO today.

Something else Lara of CWM told us, an example she gave, that I personalized and wrote in my 2021 planner is “Michelle, decide you can.” In my own mind and spirit I have to make a decision that I CAN. As a believer, I know I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.

So, how are you? Be honest with yourself and tell someone else. Don’t hold all your emotions in, where no one else can see or help. No one can read your mind…as much as we wish sometimes they could or would.
Call a therapist if you are carrying heavy burdens. I’ll be the first to tell you that counseling has been one of the greatest gifts of my life. Seeing a therapist is nothing to be ashamed or embarrassed about. I’m a firm believer that more people should sit on the couch. πŸ™‚

All this to say, be real with yourself. Talk to Jesus and someone – a trusted someone and remember, you are NEVER alone.

Until next time sweet friend…

Monday’s Muse :: Prayers

by Filed Under: Faith 2 Comments

Last night as I was trying to wind my brain down to the point where I could go to sleep, I thought, I’ll just pray.
It’s a simple statement, but the enormity of it misleads…

I’ll just pray.
As if praying is trivial…

I am a firm believer that the Lord wants to hear from us all the time. He is our Father, our Husband, our closest friend and he yearns for us to share our burdens, our excitements, our disappointments and fears. Just thinking about how often I call my best friend, and the conversations we have. That’s what Jesus wants from us {maybe not the gossip part…}. But he wants to be on speed dial. He wants to be the first one we reach out to for all the things.

Even as we pray and try to remember all the things in our prayers: giving thanks, acknowledging Him as Lord of all, confession, and petitions, you literally could be in some version or part of a prayer for a solid 24 hours. Especially in 2020 – all the pleading that we could do…

As I started thinking of all the people, things and situations for which I could pray I almost became overwhelmed. There’s so much. I debated even getting out of bed so I could spend a longer span of time in prayer.

Then I thought of this verse from 1 Thessalonians…

Paul is telling the Thessalonian people essentially, continually pray to the Lord; to be in a constant state of fellowship with God. And last night as I was lying there in my bed praying for various people, I could only think to myself, this is why.

You can’t just sit down at your morning table for your quiet time and pray for all the things in that short amount of time. I can’t possibly go thru all the people and things that need to be prayed for each night as I try to make myself drift off to sleep – someone is bound to get left out when I finally do nod off!

No, our prayers are meant to be constant…communion with the Lord. Beseeching Him on behalf of our loved ones and friends all day long. Bringing our burdens and laying them down at his throne of grace {and leaving them there for Him to deal with). Casting our cares on Him, while begging for His Spirit to lead…and praising Him for all the ways He cares for and loves His children.

May I not take praying to you for granted, Lord, but find joy and comfort in knowing that you are listening.

A couple of questions I have are:
1. If you keep a prayer journal – paper or digital?
2. How do you keep track of all the things that need to be prayed for, because as the day goes on I feel my list just keeps growing.

Until next time dear friend…

Expectations :: Marriage Edition

by Filed Under: Faith, Marriage Leave a Comment

This month is mine and Andrew’s anniversary month. In just 15 days we will celebrate our 10 year anniversary! And while our 10 years have gone by in a beautiful flash, they have not been easy. If you’ve been married to anyone longer than a year you probably know that marriage is not effortless or painless. It’s a lot of daily hard work and dedication.

I could go on and write a lot about this topic, but I’m going to save some of it for a later post. Today I want to focus in on a few things I’ve learned from my current Bible study, No Other Gods by Kelly Minter. She’s one of my favorite writers, especially of Bible studies – they are wonderfully drafted and cause me to really search the Scriptures as well as my heart.

This past week we were on session seven and each day’s study title is listed below. As you read the titles, pay attention to the person(s) you may think about as satisfying that <thing> for you.

  • He Satisfies Your Longings
  • He Rescues You
  • He Takes Away Your Sin and Shame
  • He’s the One You Can Trust
  • He Promises Blessing

Some of those are easy to say, ‘Oh I put God there, totally. He does that for me.’ But a couple of the others, it would be easy to sub in the name of your spouse or even a very close friend. I’ll admit to you that I have done that.

No one can truly satisfy these areas of your heart like Jesus can. I’m really bad at inadvertently casting my expectations and needs on others {especially Andrew}, and they constantly fail me. Andrew has failed me over and over in our ten years of marriage. Not because he isn’t a good husband, not at all. Rest assured he is one of the very best. It’s because he has failed the ridiculous expectations I have put on him and most likely kept those expectations to myself. How could he even come close to doing the things that only Jesus can do for me. I cannot put him on the same level as the Lord. Andrew cannot satisfy my soul’s deepest longings; he cannot rescue me from myself and the stupid mistakes/sins I often commit; sure I can trust him, but I cannot give my heart fully to him and expect it to never be hurt or broken, only the Lord can do that.

If you’re a believer and you’ve surrendered your life to Jesus, you know these things, but maybe you need a friendly reminder to put all your expectations and trust and hope in the Lord. He alone will satisfy your heart.

Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart. Psalm 37:4

If you’ve never surrendered your life to Jesus or you’ve never heard these things, know that Jesus is the only One who can fulfill the deepest longings of your soul.
I’m here if you have any questions or need anything.

Until next time dear sister…

Wednesday Wisdom

by Filed Under: Faith Leave a Comment

Some days I wake up overwhelmed. Do you ever feel that way?
It wasn’t anything in particular. I didn’t wake up in a tizzy over the craziness of my calendar {unlike the last two days…}. I didn’t have a terrible nightmare that had me in a sweat. No, I just woke up and felt the weight, the gravity of things that some people are dealing with and it drove me straight to the place where I like to be most.

As I sat down at my little desk for my Bible study, I glanced over to a little 3×5 note card…which listed the names of a few people who are in need of prayer. This week especially has been a week of some serious prayer needs for young and old alike. Friends have posted requests on social media, calling for ‘prayer warriors’ to intercede on their or someone else’s behalf.

As I considered the names, the stories, the petitions, I couldn’t help but feel the burdens, the pain, the questions. I’ve often heard that if you yourself are not presently in a difficult season, your responsibility is to pray for those that are.

I don’t have answers. I don’t have super powers. In most of these circumstances and situations, I really cannot do anything but pray.

Ah, but the power of prayer…[it] should not be underestimated. It is a blessing that God allows us the privilege to communicate directly with Him through prayer anytime 24/7 with no appointment necessary. What an amazing gift.Β – LivingChristian.org

When I am overwhelmed, and even at my wit’s end, I pray. When the situation is out of my control, I pray. When I am seemingly lost and destitute, I pray. When I am in need of anything, I pray.
I pray because I believe that the God of all creation hears me when I call out to Him. He desires for me to pray, to talk to Him, and so I do.

If you’ve got a prayer need, I’d love to pray for you – private message me with your request.
If you don’t want to share, I invite you in the quiet of your own time and space to call out to the One who already knows the burdens you bear, He’s ready and willing to listen.

Until next time, dear reader…

September Rewind

by Filed Under: Being a Mom, Faith, Life, Travel Leave a Comment

This has always been one of my favorite posts to write because it gives me the opportunity to go back and see all the things we have done in just a month! I often find myself thinking, “WOW! That seems like so long ago, and yet, it was just…two weeks ago.” ha.

Okay so here goes…

We started the month off with a fun weekend trip up to Saluda/Hendersonville, NC.
If you’ve never seen Pearson’s Falls…you must. It’s so majestic and peaceful, and in the middle of the woods. The last time I had been there was in 2006, when I was going through a very difficult time in my life. A dear friend sent me to Saluda for the weekend and told me just to spend some time with the Lord and I did. I remembered sitting at the base of the falls that weekend for hours just thinking about all the things going on in my life then. This time, the trip was a little shorter, but seeing the falls and allowing the splendor of it all to wash over me was rich.

Along with our weekend trip to the mountains of NC was of course, apple picking! We went to Justus Orchard, at the recommendation of a friend who also has small children that need to be entertained. πŸ™‚ It was so perfect for our family. We arrived early Saturday morning, beating some of the crowd {and yes, it got crowded}. We picked apples, fed farm animals, shot apples at Big Foot through an apple launcher – who knew!? – jumped on the biggest air pillow jumpy thing that I’ve ever seen in my LIFE! We drank apple cider slushies, ate apple doughnuts and fritters…it was all of my Fall dreams come true in one beautiful day.

Back at home and certainly with the Fall ‘itch’, Eliza Jane and I went to Wal-Mart and Kirkland’s to grab a few things to decorate the house for Fall. The front porch turned out cute, with our little scarecrows. Do you see the kids there? Eliza Jane has a flower for a head, Emory is the orange one because he has orange hair and Reynolds is the cute one with a vest! ->that was all Eliza Jane’s idea!

September was also a great month for weather in Columbia. A few mornings and afternoons were spent working outside. I finished putting together my Cultivate What Matters Powersheets for the month – talk about an accomplishment! Read more on that here.
I also started a new Bible study by Staci Eldredge, ‘Becoming Myself’, that has been a different sort of study for me, but incredible nonetheless.

After a few weeks of our church having to close it’s doors due to COVID, we were finally able to go back again and the kiddos all decided to wear stripes on our first Sunday back <3 Aren’t they adorable?

Like many families, soccer has started back for us this Fall. Can I say that I am SO thankful that my kids have organized sporting to do? I am. This pandemic has been so hard on everyone, I realize that, but especially on kids. There’s so much that they can’t understand/comprehend so to be able to allow them to run around and play with other kids has been a tremendous blessing on our lives.
Last Saturday they all had games at the same time {two are on one team, one is on a different team} so Andrew, my dad, his parents and some friends, rotated from one end of the field to the other so we could see all the kids play. I took this photo of the three of them after their games…looking like a posse ready to take over the playground.

I AM A HOPE*WRITER!!!! There, I said it out loud.
For several years now I have written blog posts as my creative outlet. I have felt like writing is a gift the Lord has given me and I want to use it to bring joy, hope, love and laughter to those who read it. I joined the Hope*Writers community this month to learn more about this art form and to establish a better writing rhythm so that I can share my gift more faithfully with you, my readers.

Ah…probably the best thing that happened this month. Reynolds was baptized. Bless his heart, he walked the aisle so many months ago and consistently asked when he could get baptized. When COVID shut everything down, all we could tell him was “when church opens back up.” Well then church opened back up, but baptisms weren’t part of the agenda and then church shut back down. We were not disheartened. We kept telling Reynolds that he would be baptized when the time was right. We also kept reaffirming that he understood what it meant to be baptized, and true to his smart, seven-year-old-self, he did.
Last Sunday, when we finally got to go back again after the second shut down, he wrote on his paper that he turned in to our Children’s Minister that he wanted to be baptized. Pastopher, as we all call him, knew this was a desire on Reynolds’ heart so he texted me the following Monday and said that they were starting to schedule baptisms, when did we want to plan for it. I replied, “Is this Sunday too soon? My dad will be here for his birthday and that would be perfect timing for us.” Done.
I love this photo on so many levels…I also love that little boy and am so thankful for those who have told him about and shown him the love of Jesus so that his heart could be captured for the Kingdom.

Photo Cred: April @ First Baptist Church Columbia

Last but certainly not least…PopPop with his grand kids. My dad was here for his birthday so we celebrated with a small group of friends by grilling out and watching football on the back deck. For dessert he had a carrot cake and Petit-Fours from Tiffany’s bakery and per the kids’ request, I made a Grammy cake…it was the perfect trio.

Ah…my heart is so full after reliving these precious moments. I was listening to a podcast earlier this morning talking about making time for reflection. I don’t do that very often, do you?
I think the one time I may do it well, is when I write this type of post. Looking back over a month always has me thankful in so many ways and maybe that’s the point of reflection and rewinding…seeing where we’ve been so we can make plans to move forward.

Until next time dear friend…

ALLL the Books!

by Filed Under: Faith, Life, Reading 2 Comments

I started thinking about writing this post and pondered, I wonder what I’ve written in the past about reading… So I went back and read a few posts from years gone by.
Four years ago {WOW!}, I wrote a post about Three Books and started off by saying basically, who has time to read?! and I’m not a reader!

Ha. Funny how things change in your life, right?

I am now a reader. Maybe not an avid reader like some…looking at you, Booba {my father-in-love}. Booba can sit down with a 10k page book and read it in two days. I’m not like him. But, I am a reader. Smiling as I say that because this is a major accomplishment for me over the past few years.

The other night, Andrew and I looked at each other, it was 8:45pm and we were both in bed, reading.
Are you laughing out loud at that like I am? I find it hilarious. My parents never did that. My parents, and Andrew’s for that matter, stayed up til who-knows-when, watching tv and falling asleep in their chairs. Anyone else have a snoring contest going on in their houses growing up like we did? πŸ™‚
I digress… This particular night, like many others, there we were, kids were in bed and we were too. Reading.

Life is so different for us with three littles. We get up early, we go hard all day – just like many of you – and we crash at night. Reading has become a way for us to all ‘come down’ from the highs of the day. Work/school, play time/recreation/sports, legos and laundry…reading is the last thing we do at night before the lights go out.

Here are just a few of the books I have read this year – most recently the last 4-5 months – or am currently reading.

If you have any questions about any of them, leave me a comment and I’ll respond asap! I will tell you that I highly recommend them ALL. Each one, in their own way, has been a blessing in my life this year.

If you’ve got a book to share, that I could add to my reading list, please leave that in a comment too!
Until next time…

Archives

My Pages

Links

There are links on my site that are affiliate links, meaning I may be compensated if you choose to purchase an item via clicking on the link I have provided. If you have any questions, please feel free to contact me.