Parenting Is Hard :: Frightful Threes
Some of you who saw the title of this post either sighed and said, “heck yes it is” and others of you may have laughed and said, “just wait…”.
A few weeks ago I posted something on my Facebook wall about how parenting can be so challenging and how I just wanted to crawl in the bed and suck my thumb… And yes, me with my three kids under four…I’m getting mine. Whatever it was I did to my parents as a kid, is coming back ten-fold.
Or whatever it was Andrew did to his parents… That’s probably the more accurate statement. {Love you, babe! haha}
I love our kids. All of them. Each of them individually. But y’all with kids, you know there are some really hard days. REALLY. Hard. Days.
And the “terrible twos” is a joke. I’m going to go with the “Frightful Threes”. And honestly so many friends told me that the age of three was much more challenging than the twos. I’m siding with them. To those of you who dealt with the drama, the screaming and fit-pitching at two, lucky you because it came and went sooner. At three, it’s been building since like 18 months.
What is this behavior.
And I don’t want this post to be all about how terrible our kid is because he’s honestly not a bad kid. He’s got the kindest, sweetest heart and he is simply wonderful.
Like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, one moment he’s great – playing with his sister, kissing his brother, being just the sweetest kid and then like the flip of a switch, someone does or says something {or he’s told “no”}, and he goes completely bizurk!
That’s when the challenge starts. Disciplining him in a way that is loving but firm; That doesn’t break his spirit but shows him that we mean what we say.
I had lunch with a friend last week, who has a son the same age as Reynolds. I sat down and my opening question to her was, “Does ___ act like a lunatic at times?!” Because we’d had two – what I call – episodes – in the last 12 hours, and it’s completely exhausting emotionally, mentally…probably even spiritually.
She grinned and confirmed that her son acts much the same way as Reynolds.
Praise.
But not really a praise…I don’t mean to say that I’m excited that her son acts like a maniac like ours…but honestly, I sighed on the inside…it’s not just us. Which, I knew in my mind and heart that there were other kids out there giving their parents a genuine run for their money {and everything else}…we weren’t alone, but I wanted to know who else was dealing with the “crazy.”
We had a real mom-to-mom talk and though it’s not completely relieving {we still have to deal with the tantrums when they happen}, it is relieving to know that there are parents all over the place with kids going thru the same stage. {Raise your hand if your son/daughter had a fit tonight at bath/bed -time!}
I ordered Dr. James Dobson’s book, The NEW Strong Willed Child a few weeks ago after several recommendations. Of course I haven’t read much of it, but the few chapters I have read, the words have resonated with me and our current situation of life with a young person.
So these frightful threes…the parenting stakes are high. He’s in it to win it…which means I have to be also.
I would love to hear from my mom friends out there – who has a strong willed child and how are/did you handling the terrible twos or frightful threes?
We’re definitely dealing with a very strong-willed 3-year-old. And his 2-year-old sister is gearing up with a will of her own. I resonate with everything you said. I think consistency, as difficult and draining as it is, is the best thing we can do. And pray for loads of grace and patience 🙂